Unexpected Revelation - written by: Me

It was an unexpected impulse which I had, somehow I told my 1st and last bully about my life/troubles at university. She is well a good listener in short talking wasn't a problem either. Well I know what you’re thinking, “Aiyor! What guy gets bullied by a girl de! So shameful” But it’s because of her that I am who I am now. First let me introduce my bully: Her name is Shirly Lai, same age as I am, below average in results as far as I can remember, has this “dai ga jie” type of aurora about her.
I remember it all started back when I was in primary 1, back then I was WEAK. Serious no joke, my dad hated wimps so I wasn’t very well to do at home either. In school she would torment me and some other guys as well; it was a punishment to be told to sit next to her by the teacher. She would hit, pinch and scold whenever anything annoyed her, and anything and everything does. Teachers felt that she helped them in a way, that’s Chinese Ed for you. She was the only one I feared. In primary 3 however, I thought: “Enough is enough! I’m going to change things.” Since I’ve got a weak body to begin with, muscle isn’t going help. So after a bit of “researching” I decided that being a strategist is the best option. By being one, I can be safe from danger, don’t have to learn to fight (no violence on my part) and all I need was brains.
Within 2 months, I formed a gang with some friends. In it was a mix of people with different qualities. There were some who had bronze but no brains, bronze with little brains, average everything, and some with leadership qualities and the bronze to match. My best friend, Kok Wai led us all. I was the advisor (strategist). We soon became the ones who bullied and had our way. We became budding delinquents. We would skip school; head out to fights with Malay’s who didn’t know their place in Chinese majority areas. At a mere age of 12, we had agreements with the Indian children, they watch our backs, and we watched theirs. A minor gang in short. Visiting the headmaster was so common it became normal.
I only swayed from that path for 6 months, 3 before UPSR and 3 after. This is because I was “dating” Primary 6, No. 1 beauty C. Kai Lai. She made me softer, and focussed on my studies. This helped me in a sense. When she left me, I went back to the gang. 90% of them were now gangsters in their respective schools. Don’t get me wrong. I never ever joined any gangster group. I remained in the advisors post (neutral for own gains).
Year 1 & 2 at my secondary school was dangerous years because the old leaders were still around, not a good time to move Kok Wai up in the ranks. So I focussed on getting people to become future Intel points. Reading more on powerful war/ political strategist showed me that intel, sources and connections were important, successful ones played both sides and gained fame. But those guys also knew how to fight, so I learned some moves from my street wise friends and muscled up. Just for self-defence but I hoped I never would have to get thrown into the field.
Year 3 came and Shirly became the girlfriend of a “dai lou” (leader) from another gang. Literally she had the aurora to begin with so it was a fitting position for her. I stood by Kok Wai’s gang till I got tired of his ways and decided to branch out to another aspiring friend who had better leadership qualities. His name was Cheung Fai, or Fai Kor as we called him. He was a failed investment, sure, he had more support because he had more brains and EQ to keep the underlings happy, but he was to open with his movements. Teachers, prefects and rivals were onto his attempt to take control of the school and be the boss of all bosses, Al Capone style I suppose. I told him it was unwise to keep such a high profile, but he said it was ok. This is when I finally decided to play both sides, my pet project was to have influence on people on the good side of the law. Which I had, and I was friends with many prefects and teacher that mattered. In case Fai Kor decided to do away with me, I could erase him.
Fai kor made his more in my fourth year at the school, Kok Wai who held many contracts with the Indian groups and minor Chinese gangs, was expelled. Fai Kor stood out and took his seat. Advisors appear to change sides fast but are usually loyal to their friends, in which I secretly helped Kok Wai outside school, giving him reports and stuff, word is that he had taken over as junior treasurer for the Seputeh district. Meaning, he had been promoted and had a hell lot more power then little Fai Kor. It was getting dangerous because a leader gone replaced by a small fry can cause unrest and sure enough fighting became a normal activity in school. I helped/played both sides well, getting success here and there. I got complacent thinking I would be safe. I think Fai Kor suspected that I was a mole in his gang. Things got worrisome for me. I decided it was time to get rid of him. I stopped giving him good advice and gave him faulty Intel. Soon teachers began rounding up gangsters from his gang and to keep my position safe, I was “questioned’ by teachers as well. Before the end of Year 4, Fai Kor and many others were kicked out, and I suspect that Kok Wai dealt with them. They never bothered me. I went into exile but still had contact with my mates, Kok Wai and the others from the old crew. They led wisely in their respective schools or areas if they were expelled.
Maintained friendly contact with them, but in school I exiled myself from the dealing of the gangs. A tad bit stupid to continue. Old allies were no longer around to protect. So I went legit, I still advised but as a counsellor. I also got myself a girlfriend then settled with clubs and other activities. Instead of gang meetings, I went socializing at internet cafes with my heng dais. I washed my hands at dealing in gang stuff. Since then, I’ve only kept contact with few or none of them. I don’t want that old life anymore, a peaceful one now is way much better. Though I’ve got to admit, you just can’t delete your past experiences and this subject does make a good story for storytelling. It’s true when they say that: “You cannot unlearn the skill you have learned once you’ve learned it, but you can choose not to use it.”
Well this is the end of my story, my advice to those who want to be advisors out there, “Don’t get caught playing both sides, and if you’re not good at it* Skills of deceiving successfully. For more details go look for masters to teach you. I’m not having any disciples so don’t come to me! I’ve washed my hands of the matter and want to have no more of it! Or don’t have the skill/talent don’t be an advisor.”
I would like to thank my bully for if she had not bullied me, I would not have learned student politics and how to be a strategist. Thank You.